Rhianna Should Have Killed Chris Brown

Remember that time Chris Brown beat the shit out of Rhianna? Yeah, me too. Let that be a lesson to the ladies that you shouldn't be going through your boyfriend's phone without permission, and that if you're dating C-Breezy you shouldn't be surprised if he's nailing other chicks everyone that even if someone appears to have it all together, they could snap at any moment. Just remember what Terrell Pryor of Ohio State said a couple years back, "Not everybody's the perfect person in the world. I mean everyone kills people, murders people, steals from you, steals from me, whatever."

Normally celebrities' problems are quickly forgotten. James Brown was arrested repeatedly for domestic violence, but then the man turns up in Undercover Brother and the world is at peace with his crimes. Charlie Sheen was picked up for domestic violence as well, but then he went on his rambling rampage tour and people have all but forgotten about that. And now Nic Cage was just arrested a couple days back (bailed out by Dog the Bounty Hunter) so we'll see how quickly we all forgive his indiscretions. Clearly we are willing to forgive his movies, why not his abuse?

Chris Brown is unfortunately not that lucky, and I'm not sure why (It's because Rhianna is still famous). I'm not saying that people should just forgive and forget, but to bring that up 2 years later while he's doing interviews for a new album seems a bit inappropriate.

OK, none of that is really the point of this post. An awesome parody by Jake Wilson just came out about the whole thing, and my favorite underage woman on earth, Willow Smith, turns up in it....





And there you have it, a glimpse into the future. Chris Brown will truly realize the error of his ways and ten years down the road get married to Willow Smith. Rhianna however still holds a grudge, and just like a woman, decides to wait until far past its relevant date to come back and address the issue. She also carries a gun...which is red like her weave.